Man Earns the Wrath of the Internet After Insisting His Fiancee’s Autistic Sister Not Be Invited to the Wedding

We love it when Internet users come together to set the record straight and bring the hammer down on ablest jerks like this one. Get ready to be simultaneously irate about this story and also all warm and fuzzy inside when you hear how people responded.

Recently, a bride-to-be turned to Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole?” (AITA) subreddit to ask whether she was wrong for refusing to consider her fiancé’s request that she uninvite her sister from her own wedding. The groom, it seems, was concerned that the sister, who is autistic, would have a meltdown at the event. The bride, however, didn’t thank it was likely that her sister would cause any problem. And, of course, she probably wanted her sister there regardless of whether it might cause a problem, because, you know, they’re sisters.

Photo: Adobe Stock/amnarj2006

“My 15-year-old sister, Nikki, is autistic,” the original poster wrote. “She used to have meltdowns and behavioral problems, but she hasn’t had those kinds of issues since she was like five. She is a responsible kid, she is often left home alone, and she sometimes babysits for some of their neighbors. She is very excited about my wedding, and I never considered that there’d be any issue.”

The poster admits that her sister “has more anxiety than average,” but she says that shouldn’t make any difference in her invite status. “Just because certain things make her worried or upset doesn’t mean she’ll have a meltdown at a totally unrelated event,” she writes.

Photo: Adobe Stock/Pixel-Shot

The bride notes that her younger sister has been to “other weddings and big events before” and never had a problem, but she says her fiancé, James, insists that the girl needs “accommodations” and should not be invited to the wedding.

The post has garnered over 10,000 upvotes and comments, with the vast majority of people saying that the original poster is not the a**hole in this situation and that the groom is taking things too far in saying that his future sister-in-law shouldn’t be at the wedding just in case she has a meltdown and makes a scene.

Photo: Adobe Stock/Mustansar

On this specific subreddit, posters ask readers, “Am I the a**hole here?” and readers are asked to respond in one of four ways:

NTA – Not The A**hole
YTA – You’re The A**hole
ESH – Everyone Sucks Here
NAH – No A**holes Here

This particular thread has received an overwhelming majority of “NTA” responses.

Reddit user EnthusiasticStoner says the groom is to blame for “clear and offensive ableism and bigotry” while comin_up_shawt branded him a “piece of work” and suggested the bride call off the wedding. “Imagine if she herself became disabled? He’d divorce her in a hot minute because ‘she needed too many accommodations,'” the commenter says.

Photo: Adobe Stock/LRafael

Chance-Mood-889 chimes in, “NTA. Reconsider inviting James to this wedding.”

“She should also consider whether she would want children with this person,” says drwhogirl_97. “Autism is very genetic so there’s a decent chance that any children they have would be autistic.”

Hundreds of people added their witty remarks and thoughtful ponderings, but there was one common thread in all of them: the teenage sister with autism should be invited to the wedding and provided with real accommodations if she needs or wants them. Commenters were more divided over whether the groom should be allowed at the wedding.

This thread just goes to show that although there are some real jerks in the world, most people truly believe that people on the autism spectrum deserve to be treated with the same dignity and respect as everyone else.

Support Research & Therapy

Help those with Autism and their families at The Autism Site for free!